Bye-bye, John

Madden's like your funny uncle that gives you bear hugs, always has weird metaphors for things, and tells you long, drawn-out tales of Brett Favre's greatness.

John is now leaving us in the un-funny and un-comforting hands of Cris Collinsworth and Phil Simms and Greg Gumbel and Al Michaels--dudes who I'm pretty sure would never give you a bear hug. His retirement makes me sad.

In other news, I'm still such a tomboy.

"If the quarterback completes a pass in the endzone, it's a touchdown."