Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Things that delight me while breaking my little heart, 07/08/09

1. Dilla, "Coming Back"


2. Coming home every day and not seeing this hanging on the wall in my living room, and feeling sad and broken inside as a result.
It's hard being me sometimes.

3. Those goddamn "My Wish" stories on SportsCenter, wherein an adorable and sick child gets a wish fulfilled by spending time with his/her sports hero. The magic formula is as follows:

- Tearful interview with parent who feels powerless and describes the day the doctor gently broke the news about the diagnosis (leukemia, cystic fibrosis, insert heartbreaking ailment here),

- Footage of child in hospital gown, playing video game or board game with family member or nurse, maintaining a positive outlook on life despite poor prognosis,

- Child watching sports hero in a football/baseball/basketball game and cheering for the hero to make a big play. GODDAMMIT ESPN.

Jamarkus and Tony Hawk! Stefan and David Ortiz! I'm in a glass case of emotion!

Did you hear about Ian in Amarillo? He's 6 years old, has a smile like the sun coming up, and is quite sick. He goes to see the Cowboys at training camp and gets a Marion Barber jersey and gets to run plays with the receivers and they let him run TDs in and all of this makes me like the Cowboys even though I HATE the Cowboys. Damn you, devilish programmers and rulers of content at ESPN! I don't need to see 9 year olds with cancer as I'm lounging around in apt. 302, drinking tea and daydreaming about Hank Shocklee's production wizardry. My tear-stained face is not cute and my emotions do not appreciate being manipulated in your evil hands. Plus the stories are cliche-filled ("Stefan found himself in a world no child should have to know so well--a room defined by hospital rooms and a harsh, unforgiving disease," oh dear) but I don't even care and that tells you right there how powerful these stories are. These televised pieces make me forgive poorly-written copy and I never, ever thought that could happen to me.

So, in conclusion, ESPN: I hate you for doing this to me. And please keep it comin. Thank you.

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