Friday, August 28, 2009

Pharoahe's official like Starter, hit harder than Fort Greene. Also, Random Tribute: my Fantasy Football team which will rule all things this season.

GEN-IUSSS, nearly every bar in this song. Sometimes I forget about Monch's wordplay-ical talents and sometimes I forget about the majestic musical year of nineteen hundred and ninety-nine. I've taken the liberty of highlighting the finest and most wittiest and bestest parts below.
(And yes, I do hate baseball; however, everybody loves a good fellatio reference. Everybody. Blauch my Knob like Chuck. What was that word I used earlier? OH YES. Genius.)

Monch - "Official"

My style, make the whole crowd Se-au
Like number 55 on the Chargers
I promise thee I Dodge a n--a like Raul Mondesi
Somberly stay calm, fighting Means like Natrone

I'm on the phone in the luxury box like George Steinbrenner
The owner, makin you give your Diamond-back like Arizona

Yo the realness stuck, females Blauch my Knob like Chuck

Not Allen Iverson, forget crossin-over shake men
Similar to Troy, I bring the pain destined to Aik-man
Break men off, take men out, make me wanna slander
Prime Time, my rhyme defense beyond Deion Sanders
I walk the earth with my Rod in this Strick-land
Promise, people thought I was Thomas Hearns the way I Hit, Man

(!! Good
lord, when are you write something like this??)

If only the whole beat were like just after the 2 1/2 minute mark! OH LEE STONE, why'd you have to go and do me like that, WHY. Sigh.


got mah team yesterday! Monch is official, and you know what else is official? PITTSBURGH'S DEFENSE, officially being mine*. It's official. Thanks to all of you who send positive energy out into the universe for me. Eckhart Tolle, goddammit if you weren't right after all.

I got no Mike Turner, no Matt Forte, no Frank Gore, no Larry Fitz. And I am trying to suppress my IRL feelings for that loudmouth P Rivers and just focus on the points he shall get me in Fantasy. However, please note that I officially worked out a deal with The Andre Johnson and The Jason Witten. The geniuses at Yahoo! Fantasy Football had to give me so-so players for the rest of my squad just to make it fair to everybody else in my league.

In closing, I officially have things sewn up, in the bag, tight and right, and in a headlock. It's official. BRANG IT.


PPS, in keeping with the tomboy theme -

Documentary Manny Ramirez Talking About Turns Out To Be 'Billy Madison'


1 comment:

danps said...

I was going to leave you some Fruit Bats links but if you're going to pimp Pittsburgh you can find them your own damn self.