Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Risin' up to the challenge of our rival

“Liars go to hell” - Manny Pacquiao, shouted in the general vicinity of Floyd Mayweather.

Snitches and something about stitches, bros before hoes, ain't no such things as halfway crooks, yeah yeah. Boys and their little sayings, so cute.

I would've gone with “Quit your bitchin, or get BLAOW in your babble-box,” copyright Mother Fucking DOOM!*, due to the fact that my Doom obsession knows no bounds as well as the fact that it's fun to say babble box.

Back to the matter at hand (heh, it's a story about boxing): Floyd told the world he's suspicious that Manny is doping because he's from the Philippines, allegedly a major producer of performance-enhancing drugs. I'm part Irish, so Floyd says I have a potato farm and I like to set off car bombs.

Manny and his people became so angered by this accusation that they promptly sued Floyd for defamation. Shit-talking is highly important in boxing, a way of displaying your manhood that's right up there with quick fists and the ability to mean-mug and pose standing sideways on a poster. Tough-guy reputations need constant tending in the public arena, I get it. But this is really some next-levels crybaby behavior, getting the justice system involved. Everybody just calm down! FOCUS, people, I need to see focus! So many times it happens so fast/You trade your passion for glory! These gentlemen need to at least take it to Twitter first, then maybe call into Rosenberg's show when one of them is an in-studio guest for some scripted bickering, then an abrupt phone hang-up, and then a week or so of each claiming victory in the verbal sparring match.

I wish that Manny would ignore the taunts until fight day, when everything culminates in the ring, fists meeting faces. This new bitchiness in the form of litigation is unappealing. Protesting too hard means his ego's bruised. Also, there's
the fedora. I don't approve. He's losing his luster. There are no good Filipino rappers (name one), so he's got to keep boxing on lock if he wants to hold my interest.

Survivor - “Eye of the Tiger.” I'm sorry, this is totally Journey. I'm not an idiot.



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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Bambu. Blaow. In ya babble box.